Jack Handey

Rated by 50+ man-crushers

• "If you work on a lobster boat, sneaking up behind someone and pinching him is probably a joke that gets old real fast." - Jack Handey -- мεη σғ нιsтσяү
• To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other. -- Jack Handey -- Ed Coburn
• I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it. ~Jack Handey -- Booutique
• My new millionaire idea is one regular shoe and one 'swollen' shoe, for when you get bit by a rattlesnake ~ Jack Handey Deep Thoughts -- Gilit Archbald
• Jack Handey Deep Thoughts~ Sometimes I think the so-called experts actually ARE experts. -- Honemoana Budge
• Jack Handey Deep Thoughts~ One thing a computer can do that most humans cant is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse. -- If You Ask Us
• What is it that makes a complete stranger dive into an icy river to save a solid-gold baby? Maybe we'll never know.-Jack Handey -- zekaraty
• Jack Handey Deep Thoughts~ One thing a computer can do that most humans cant is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse. -- Invisible VPN Client
• Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey: One thing vampire children have to be taught early on is, don't run with a wooden stake. -- Mike Miller
• .To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other. ~Jack Handey -- Emile Awe Reed
• "If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down." - Jack Handey -- EarthFest
• When you go ice-skating, try not to swing your arms too much, because man that really annoys me. - Jack Handey -- Mark Juelich
• I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it."- Jack Handey -- lizle13
• Jack Handey Deep Thoughts~ When you go ice-skating try not to swing your arms too much because that really annoys me. -- Norma Bron
• I think what I want to be in life more than anything is Jack Handey. -- Edelweissty
• If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down.-Jack Handey -- Lisa Clemons
• If you're a young mafia member and you're out on your first date, I bet it's really embarrassing if somebody tries to kill you. -Jack Handey -- Muhney
• "I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it. ~Jack Handey" -- ROCKSTARR DJz
• If you work on a lobster boat, sneaking up behind someone and pinching him is probably a joke that gets old real fast.Jack Handey -- Political Incorrect
• I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it. Jack Handey -- Lanny Zechar
• If you work on a lobster boat, sneaking up behind someone and pinching him is probably a joke that gets old real fast - Jack Handey -- Gina Valley
• Jack Handey Deep Thoughts~ When you go for a job interview I think a good thing to ask is if they ever press charges. -- Office_Pot
• I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it. ~Jack Handey -- thaici santos
• I bet one legend that keeps recurring throughout history, in every culture, is the story of Popeye. - Jack Handey Deep Thoughts -- Arturo Delgado
• Jack Handey Deep Thoughts~ Just as bees will swarm about to protect their nest so will I swarm about to protect my nest of chocolate eggs. -- Marvin Brody
• Jack Handey Deep Thoughts: I'm telling you, just attach a big parachute TO THE PLANE ITSELF Is anyone listening to me -- Clara Trommer
• Jack Handey Deep Thoughts~ Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis. -- Jean Brownill
• Jack Handey Deep Thoughts~ Im telling you just attach a big parachute TO THE PLANE ITSELF Is anyone listening to me -- Inga Ryser
• If you're a young Mafia gangster out on your first date, I bet it's really embarrassing if someone tries to kill you. Jack Handey -- Meghan Millea
• I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it. ~Jack Handey -- Sioni Academy
• ...Zucchini pesto(v), Corn chowder(v). "I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it." ~Jack Handey -- Darn Good Soup
• I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it. - Jack Handey -- [ P I M : P ]
• Jack Handey Deep Thoughts~ One thing vampire children have to be taught early on is dont run with a wooden stake. -- sanja riznic
• Jack Handey Deep Thoughts~ Just as bees will swarm about to protect their nest so will I swarm about to protect my nest of chocolate eggs. -- News 1800
• Jack Handey Deep Thoughts~ I bet one legend that keeps recurring throughout history in every culture is the story of Popeye. -- Christi Pattie
• What is it that makes a complete stranger dive into an icy river to save a solid-gold baby? Maybe we'll never know.-Jack Handey -- Ross Barakat
• "I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it. ~Jack Handey" -- Adolfo Ayala
• Jack Handey Deep Thoughts~ When you go ice-skating try not to swing your arms too much because that really annoys me. -- Willie Veloso
• To paraphrase Jack Handey, I bet one legend that keeps recurring throughout history, in every culture, is the story of Waluigi -- David Thorpe
• I'm telling you, just attach a big parachute TO THE PLANE ITSELF Is anyone listening to me - Jack Handey Deep Thoughts -- Erica Beck
• Jack Handey Deep Thoughts~ My new millionaire idea is one regular shoe and one swollen shoe for when you get bit by a rattlesnake. -- Elvira Bevly
• Let's be honest Isn't a lot of what we call tap dancing really just nerves - Jack Handey Deep Thoughts -- Tania Flores
• "The face of a child can say it all. Esp the mouth part of the face". Jack Handey. So true. -- Peripatetic Parent
• Jack Handey Deep Thoughts~ I dont say that the bird is good or the bat is bad. But I will say this At least the bird is less nude. -- Maude Hanisko
• When you go for a job interview, I think a good thing to ask is if they ever press charges. - Jack Handey Deep Thoughts -- Ismael Shanks
• Jack Handey Deep Thoughts: When you go for a job interview, I think a good thing to ask is if they ever press charges. -- Trey Gordon
• Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis.-Jack Handey -- Daniel Jewelers
• I just found out he is still alive. Why isn't he the king of comment? Too long winded? Oh I know, it's not 1991. -- Eric Gray
• Jack Handey Deep Thoughts~ One thing vampire children have to be taught early on is dont run with a wooden stake. -- Sierra Sorvillo
• I hope life isn?t a big joke, because I don?t get it. - Jack Handey -- Stephen Groner

Throwback Thursday #TBT

TOP